My name is Ninah and I am an Alcoholic. My sobriety date is June 6, 2018. Before walking into the rooms of Alcoholics Anonymous, I was a self-centered, self-seeking, walking tornado who never took responsibility for the consequences brought on by my actions and reactions. I was spiritually bankrupt and I never really had a relationship with God, but now I consider God to be my Higher Power.
By taking suggestions, getting a sponsor, working the steps, and going to meetings, I have learned so much about myself and what my true purpose is in life. Every morning I wake up trying to be the best person I can be and to give back and to help the next alcoholic.
I have learned four life-changing things about myself in the last year and a half from this program.
- This is a disease of perception, which means I don’t see things or hear things right.
- My alcoholism was not the problem, it was my solution to my way of thinking and not being able to handle life on life’s terms. My whole life has been run in fear: fear of failure, fear of intimacy, fear of the unknown, fear of success, and the list goes on and on.
- Fear and faith cannot coincide at the same time so by turning my will over to the care of God, I must trust my Higher Power that everything is exactly how it is supposed to be.
- Lastly, I’ve learned my feelings are not always the truth. Yes, they are real but validated by my twisted perception, which if I don’t stay spiritually fit, my disease will try to convince me again and again that they are true.
I owe my new life to Alcoholics Anonymous and because of all this, I am grateful to say I am an Alcoholic!